“Being truly conscious requires stepping back from compulsions and attachments – a change in the operating system. And sometimes we need a helping hand for that. We can’t do it on our own, nor should we have to.” 

For me, the healing, the coming home, starts with shame. In this solo episode, I share my personal story woven together with words from wise teachers and thinkers. 

The intention in this honest, and unpolished episode is to share my hope, courage and strength for any other yogis or seekers out there struggling with their own mind, addictions and compulsions. 

Let’s all remember Swamiji’s words; “God lives in the effort.” 

QUOTES:

“Hell is where nothing connects.” – T.S. Elliot

““My imperfections and my failures are as much a blessing as my successes and talents, I lay them both at God’s feet.” – Gandhi

“The analogy used in Y12SR is that as humans we are a vessel. Addiction turns our vessel upside down. Steps 1 – 3 help turn the vessel right side up.  We wake up. Once the vessel is right side up, steps 4 – 9 help prepare the vessel. We clean up. With Steps 10 – 12 we set sail on the spiritual voyage. We grow up.” – Y12SR

“I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship.” – Louisa May Alcott

Sri Maharaj Nisargadatta always inspires my journey. Here are two of my favourite words from him;

“It is earnestness that is indispensable, the crucial factor. Sadhana is only a vessel and it must be filled to the brim with earnestness, which is but love in action. For nothing can be done without love.”

“Wisdom is knowing I am nothing, Love is I am everything, in between the two. My life flows”

Two excerpts from Gabor Mate In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts;

“Being cut off from our own natural self-compassion is one of the greatest impairments we can suffer. Along with our ability to feel our own pain go our best hopes for healing, dignity and love. What seems nonadapative and self-harming in the present was, at some point in our lives, an adaptation to help us endure what we then had to go through. If people are addicted to self-soothing behaviours, it’s only because in their formative years they did not receive the soothing they needed. Such understanding helps delete toxic self-judgment on the past and supports responsibility for the now. Hence the need for compassionate self-inquiry.”

“Not all addictions are rooted in abuse or trauma, but I do believe they can all be traced to painful experience. A hurt is at the centre of all addictive behaviours. It is present in the gambler, the Internet addict, the compulsive shopper and the workaholic. The wound may not be as deep and the ache not as excruciating, and it may even be entirely hidden—but it’s there.”

SERENITY PRAYER for Addicts and Yogi alike.

God, grant me the serenity (Awareness, connection with something bigger)

to accept the things I cannot change, (Acceptance, foundation, turning the vessel, right side up)

the courage to change the things I can, (Action, core, preparing the vessel for sail)and the wisdom to know the difference. (Let go, expression, set sail on spiritual voyage)

Most important prayer from Isha Upanishad:

Om Puurnnam-Adah Puurnnam-Idam Puurnnaat-Puurnnam-Udacyate |

Puurnnasya Puurnnam-Aadaaya Puurnnam-Eva-Avashissyate ||

Om Shaantih Shaantih Shaantih ||

In this episode, I mention a few resources

➖Yoga and the 12 Steps: www.y12sr.com 

➖And check out this lit Season 1, Episode 25 with Nikki in season 1 HERE

➖Gabor Mate’s book, “In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction” HERE

Any my email below if you’d like to connect or reflect privately on this episode. More on this topic in the next episode. 

Thanks for being here. 

💭Support the podcast and join our monthly satsang at patreon.com/acuriousyogipodcast   

💭 If you liked this episode, please leave a review on Apple podcasts – it really, really helps the show reach more people, plus I love reading each one. 

💭 Share your biggest takeaway on Instagram stories @bobbipaidel  

💭Join me in northern India for the Yog Sadhana Retreat Himalaya March 2025 bobbipaidel.com/himalayan-retreat 
💭 If you’d like to chat about the show, be a guest, or practice together find me at bobbipaidel.com/connect 🙏♥️✨